‘The Soul knows how to heal itself. The challenge is to silence the mind’.
The dark night of the soul started long time back. Even though my life was filled with moments of joy and comforts ( comforts as in with materialistic things) , i found myself admiring the satisfied life I had. Not to mention the good old young days of fun and laughter , an amazing adolescence and as I grew into a young woman i always felt I was a bit blessed in most aspects . This made me truly believe I was lucky and more wonderful things were in store for me.
I prayed hard, hoped hard and loved hard. I knew I had it all. Until the dark night of my soul started. With everything I had and all that I was, there was something missing within my soul. It was lost, lonely , craving for something infinite, something inspiring. I was lost in this whole world , in the vast universe. I was lost within my soul.
Somehow the matters of the heart are the most relevant. Often the mind controls and conditions us into something we are not. We are taught by the society to live in a fixed particular way and this hampers our growth to a great degree. We are conditioned in such a way that anything outside its boundaries becomes wrong and unacceptable. We Become what the society makes us and forget who we truly are.
The lessons we learn in life leave us feeling miserable. We lose identities. Even today I say I have an identity crisis.
Oscar Wilde says that : ” Each man kills the thing he loves” the mere possibility of getting what we want fills the man with guilt. And we fear more than anything of loosing it even before we achieve it. Fear cripples our dreams and aspirations.
Fear hampers growth . We are groomed into something we are not and we are caught in a web dat things happen only according to our faith and destiny whereas we cannot control. To accept and live with it becomes a part of life.
We start looking outside for happiness . And then we search for people who make us forget the pain. We search for reasons to make us seem powerful as if we are fighting and battle , only that we are loosing in the end.
This is when the so called ‘ego’ sets in.
The ego nudges us to wear masks and pretend to be someone we are not in this materialistic world.The more we disguise ourselves the more better to excel in this society. We hide our flaws and show everyone that we have perfect lives . We ignore the soul calling and satisfy our egos with pride. Life then looks accomplished even though we haven’t accomplished anything . We then start living in this fake world we have created.
Our calling is always there No matter what circumstances.
We need to search for answers as to why we are here. Why we have been created by God . Not just to live in this conditioned society but to be something more than just a mere name and identity. We have to free ourselves practice greatness by practicing kindness, empathy, love and above all gratitude. Then we become instruments of God and we understand clearly our personal calling and why we are here.
The story of Narcissus always inspires me.
Narcissus would kneel down on the banks of the river pedra to contemplate his beauty. He was known far and wide for his beauty. One day as he knealt down he fell and drowned in the river. Later the goddesses of the banks came by the river and found the fresh waters turned into a salty lake. They then asked the lake why it was weeping?? The lake replied I cry for Narcissus. And the goddesses asked why do u weep for him . The lake replied ” it is because every time he knelt Down by my banks I could see my own beauty reflected back thru his eyes “.
Live the soul way. Listen to it and it will give you all the answers.